never mind

Despite Mr McMuffin's consideration, I was awake for most of the night. Reminds me a bit of the early days, but I'm not complaining. I have decided (as if it's possible to decide to change one's entire personality overnight) to become a person who counts their blessings every day and I have many of them. I predict this will last a couple of days before I revert to type, but it is quite nice starting the day felling happy and of course, blessed.

We've not written much due to being busy/lazy and we're off to Scotlasnd at the weekend, so I doubt we'll catch up. It's a shame really, not to post when our lives are most interesting, but there you go, crumbs is what you get, when you really deserve a big slice of cake.

sitting here knackered

I'm writing this at 04:36 sitting on the back doorstep smoking a fag. I got woken at 02:30 with a call about a mental health assessment. I went straight back to sleep, dedicated person that I am. They called me again at 03:00. The number they left was a pager, so I had to leave a message asking them to call me. It all seemed slightly surreal. Just as I thought I was going back to bed, the police called. When I returned their call, no one knew why I was calling. I was told that the officer I needed to speak to was out, but he would call me when he gets back. I'm now waiting for that call. I am reluctant to go back to bed because Mrs McMuffin and Babycake will get woken when they call. I guess I will spend all of tomorrow feeling slightly hungover from the lack of sleep. I hate that. Mrs McMuffin just poked her head out of the bedroom window wanting to know whe I'm coming back to bed. I'm off to bed. Hope you're all having a more restful night. By the way I'm posting this from my lovely new Palm TX using the Typepad mobile app. Very cool.

beguiling babycake

Babycake has taken to the island and now thinks he's a little Portuguese boy, demanding to be carried everywhere.  he hasn't quite got the knack of smiling at the complete strangers who try to wrench him from my arms and cuddle him.  Instead, he quite understandably looks terrified and clings to me that little bit tighter.

I have to say, like Mr McMuffin I am completely exhausted and am noy excited at the thought of packing up and spending the whole of tomorrow travelling home.  That's always the prob;lem with going away, the getting back.

portos santos

Well, we take back everything we ever said, or thought, about the place.  It was lovely.  I had forgotten how beautiful beaches can be.  The island itself is a barren desolate bit of volcanic rock in the middle of the ocean.  It has some peaks as we were reminded by a couple of locals before we set off.  The peaks looked like tiny volcanoes.  It was all very sweet.  We had a lovely relaxing day, with a long lunch and a couple drinks before taking Babycake swimming in the sea.  He hated it, athough he was quite taken by the sand.  The cold water, which was actually quite warm, was just too much for him.  We even managed to contribute that little bit extra to the island's economy.  We booked and paid for a bus tour of the island but didn't go.  By some magic, Babycake managed to stay awake for most of the day.  He was up at 05:30 and didn't get to sleep until about 23:00.  His day was mostly spent making friends.  He has an interesting approach to this.  First of all he selects someone, according to some private test, and then he stares at them until they make eye contact with him.  Once they are looking at him he smiles shyly and waves, and then they are hooked.  This went on all day.  We had met half the passengers on the boat by the end of the day.

We are completely knackered.  He will not go to sleep this morning.  We are trying to think of ways to fill our boring Sunday.  Everything, or almost everything, closes on Sundays.  We will probably end up going to the botantical gardens.  Mrs McMuffin loves it there and goes every time we come here, but I have been at least three times, and how many times does a man have to look at a garden, however nice it is?

not so beautiful

What Mr McMuffin actually meant was trying to cover up the hideous sunburn I have inadvertently acquired.  I pride myself on sensible sun bathing yet always seem to be the one that reddens, while Mr McMuffin and Babycake remain unscathed.

It is rather gorgeous here and the gloom of a British autumn seems very far away (well, a few hundred miles at least).  Mr McMuffin is again fantasising about living here, yet has not made any attempt to learn the language, so I'm not sure how he thinks we'd support ourselves.  Anyway, lovely as it is, I'm not sure I'd want Babycake dreaming of the day he could leave the island and us and head to London. Back home, he only has to jump on a train or a bus and he's in the centre of town within the hour. 

So we're off to Porto Santo tomorrow, a trip we have chosen not to take for the last five holidays here.  We can't put it off any longer and so think of us when we're up and out of the hotel by half six tomorrow.

just got a moment

Babycake and I have left Mrs McMuffin upstairs making herself beautiful for the day.  We are getting the hang of this baby on holiday thing and our days are starting earlier and earlier.  Which is sort of a good thing.  Babycake seems to be doing really well.  We have managed to keep his routine but we foolishly thought we could buy baby food here.  Modern European country and all that.  At home I usually make stuff for him, or use a combination of home made and select shop bought food.  We have a tiny kitchen so making food is really out of the question.  Although I have boiled him up some lentils. There is a terrible selection of baby food in the supermarkets.  All of the food seems to be made by Nestle and comes laden with sugar and salt and any number chemicals.  The best stuff we have found is a chicken stew thingy, which claims to have no additional salt.  Surprisingly, it has salt in the ingredients.  Clearly what they meant was after throwing in a handful of salt, we didn't put anymore in.  Anyway, Babycake loves it.  He ate a whole 200gms of it yesterday, which is probably about twice as much as he usually eats at one meal.

On to more pleasant topics.  The weather is lovely.  Very sunny and warm.  We have spent the days wandering around Funchal stopping every now and then for coffee and cakes, or an ice cream.  It is all rather idyllic.  We have decided to branch out tomorrow and have booked a trip to Porto Santo, an island a couple of hours away from here.  Apparently, Christopher Columbus lived there for a while.  As far as I can see Porto Santa is famous for having a beach, and I think that is that.  We are going to be there for about 8 hours.  Wish us luck.  I'll let you know how we get on.  Oh, by the way, this is another first for Babycake.  His very first boat trip.  I do hope he doesn't get seasick.

two firsts for babycake

Well, we're here at last.  We set off at 06:45 this morning and after what seemed like an eternity we finally arrived in Funchal at about 16:00.  We then had to play the changing rooms game. The hotel had given us a beautiful apartment.  It really was lovely.  The only problem was that the building site outside of our window blocked out any sunlight, and the noise meant that we were afraid to open the windows.  We had to move immediately before Mrs McMuffin started on about the dust.  We were shown a couple of other apartments and finally picked one on the very top of the building.  It's a bit smaller, but very nice, with a view of the sea and everything.  When I say everything, I really mean the building site.  No sooner had we got in, than Mrs McMuffin announced that she really wasn't feeling well.  I have left her upstairs having a nap.  I took Babycake shopping, but of course as soon as I entered the supermarket he started with the crying thing that he does so well.  I just grabbed the first thing that came to hand and gave it to him.  It was a packet of salted almonds.  Almost anything new distracts him from crying, especially when it is 'I am bored' crying.  I did my shopping and at the checkout I did a terrible, shameful thing.  I stole the salted almonds.  I just couldn't bear to take them from Babycake, he would have screamed the house down, so I just pretended that I didn't notice that he had them.  He has now fallen asleep clutching his nuts.  This has allowed me the time to have a pint of lager and post this.

This has been a momentous day for Babycake.  He has been to his first foreign country and engaged in his first bit of shoplifting.

That's all for now folks.  I'll try to keep you posted throughout the week.

we're off again...

...on holiday, just for a week. Babycake isn't sure what's going on, but he looked at a photo of me and said 'Mummy' yesterday, so at least he knows which side his bread is buttered. We hope to have fun and hope you have fun wherever you are and whatever you're doing (am practising my sign off for my fantasy talk show). Thanks for Ms Ginger Cake and Gypsy Tart for sharing the Slinky care duties and au 'voir!

working for the technology

I have got the opportunity at work to make a little money doing some overtime. I'm thinking of it as working for technology. I am thinking about getting a new iMac and a Macbook, which should offer enough computing power to last us a couple of years at least. Mrs McMuffin is a little bit ambivalent about spending this kind of money, but she is wisely keeping quiet. The biggest shock to me over the last few months has been my developing obsession with this pram. For some reason, well for many really good reasons, I have become increasingly convinced that Babycake needs to have a £500 pram. The thing is, it's light as a feather, with handles that were clearly made for people of normal height, rather than shrunken troll people, and the best bit is that it has independent suspension. It just seems to float. A dreamy machine, and I think worth every penny (not really). The other thing that I forgot to mention is that it just looks fantastic. I guess it was only a matter of time until my attention turned to baby technology. What next I wonder?

safe and sound

We have got so complacent about Babycake's good health, that it came as a complete shock when he developed a fever and horribly shallow breathing in the early hours of Tuesday morning. We broke out the thermometer and Calpol from storage and tried to work out how to use both of them. Babycake promptly threw up the Calpol the first time, but we did read his temperature, 38.4 C (that's 101 F), which isn't scary scary, but scary enough. Bless that little lad, though, he was still trying to smile at us and sing his special wake up song, even with burning skin and pink eyes.

The on call doctor told us to take him to hospital, where they checked him over and fortunately his temperature had come down to more usual levels and there were no signs of anything more concerning. He finally cooled down properly last night, and we are relieved. I'm sure he'll have many more nights of fever ahead, but at least we'll be better prepared for it.

Today he seems better and after a marathon four hour sleep when I was at work, is now cheerfully warbling, eating food and playing with his toys. As a special treat for the lad, I have paid silly money for a new baby carrier as I want to be able to carry him on my back and the sling isn't wide enough to allow that. I really hope it works, as I miss carrying him round and feeling his little feet against my side.

they're after me

Just ten minutes after my post this morning I received a letter from the NSPCC asking me for money. How creepy is that? I kept it on me all day, just waiting for the opportunity to phone them up and ask why they want money from someone who actually does protect children, rather than pretend they do. Anyway, I think the NSPCC have marked my card, so this is probably the last I'll say on the subject. Psst, they're behind you!

he really isn't a quiet baby

It was only when my big sister asked about the photo of Babycake behind bars (in the lovely playpen as used by the Niece and the Nephew) that I wondered if we should explain. Our little parody of the NSPCC advert took some time to prepare, as Babycake just refused to stop smiling. We got him in a thoughtful moment, then MrMcMuffin changed the picture to black and white to emphasise the food stain on his top and hey presto-we have a neglected looking baby! The NSPCC would be proud of our misrepresentation, after all they've made a nice little earner out of it.

well...

I thought about it and thought about it. I've just ordered my Palm TX. I managed to convince myself that it really would fit in with my IT strategy. While I was at it, I also managed to persuade Mrs McMuffin that we really needed a 10.1MP camera too, so I have ordered a Samsung NV10. Very nice. Of course, it does mean that I have to sell my lovely little Sony DSC-T1, but fortunately, Ms Gypsy Tart has always lusted after it. I can't wait.

By the way, Mrs McMuffin forgot to mention the best bit about going to Madeira this time. I have booked the Meet and Greet parking service at Gatwick. We will drive our car right up to the terminal where someone will collect it and take it away to be parked. How cool is that?

this way lies madness

Babycake can now balance upright for about half a minute and can also lick his lips. He is very proud of himself and can be found standing, squealing, licking his lips and clapping all at the same time. Frankly, I've only just got over the need to touch his chest when he's sleeping to check it's going up and down and am downright terrified of the scary stuff he is going to do in the near future (Melody, it's all your fault!), as well as in the distant future (get into badly driven cars, dabble with drink and drugs, get into religion...). The more I contemplate the fear, the more I admire my parents and any parent, for letting their kids do anything at all.

In other news we are heading for a gathering of clan McMuffin in November up in Scotland and for once in my life I'm not dreading it. We are all united in our admiration of Babycake now and as his mother, I appear to have some status in the family! Forget education, career and personal qualities, all I really needed was a working set of ovaries and the ability to squeeze out a sprog.

neeeeeeeeeed...

I am lusting after a new organiser: a Palm TX. It looks lovely and has WiFi and Bluetooth. It usually costs around the £200 mark, but I've found some on eBay for only £125. The only problem is Mrs McMuffin, who asked me today if I really needed a new one. She doesn't understand that I can't take my old one out in public anymore. It's too embarassing. What's a boy to do?

aah, they grow up so quickly

So we were watching tv on Friday night, like millions of other people with no lives to speak of and realised how much we liked Jamie Oliver and Charlotte Church. Jamie has gone from the full lipped but skinny chopping cheeky chappy to the somewhat miserable, but a bit beefy old git, in front of our eyes. Charlotte (voice of an angel, conversation of a navvy) has somwhow transformed from child prodigy to gorgeous, smart, funny and foul mouthed twenty something. The test of likeability has to be whether you'd be happy to dine with them and both Jamie and Charls are welcome round McMuffin mansions any time, although obviously we'd want a bit of notice if we had to rustle up a bit of quality grub for Jamie. I'm sure Cahrlotte would be happy with a cheese and onion toastie and a glass of wine.