baby-father

Help me. Mrs McMuffin and I went to our first antenatal class last night. It was run by a couple of local mid-wives, one of which will probably help to deliver master McMuffin next month (Oh, my God! Where has the time gone?). This was the first of three fun filled evenings. I don't think I am going to be going to any more. One of the mid-wives just sucked the life from the room. She spoke in a slow, vaguely distracted kind of way, with lots of (pregnant?) pauses. It was torture listening to her. By the end of the evening, I was left quite convinced that she wasn't really a mid-wife. I think she had wandered in off the street and was trying to wing it. Maybe it was like one of those unkind research projects where scientists try to work out how far we go along with things. Mrs McMuffin tried to defend her, and it took a little while before she admitted that she too had her doubts, but had been trying to convince herself that the mid-wife was okay. She couldn't bear the thought that this slightly odd, perhaps incompentent, woman would be helping to deliver our baby. I suppose it didn't help that in her attempts to get us to share our experiences, the mid-wife asked a second time mother about how she felt after the baby was born. She said, "tired." And when she asked her how she felt about taking her baby home, she said, "excited." Wow. I certainly was touched by the insight.

I wonder if I am being too mean?

I have kind of struggled with this pregnancy. I guess it is one of the problems that men sometimes face in these situations. Sure, I have a semi-psychotic wife to remind me that there is a baby on the way, but until I see him I just find it hard to keep him in mind. Mrs McMuffin was able to immediately give up smoking and drinking as soon as she found out that she was pregnant. I'll give up too, the smoking that is, not the drinking, but it is practically impossible to do that without the baby in front of me. I guess Mrs McMuffin carries a constant reminder with her everywhere she goes.

Only six weeks to go.

mattafix

I have just discovered this great song by Mattafix. I imagine everyone has already heard it, but I was watching MTV this morning and heard it for the first time. I immediately downloaded the song. It's called Big City Life. Have a listen. Let me know what you think. By the way, I have been listening to their new album this afternoon. It sounds great, but nothing really jumps out in the same way. I'm sure it will sell gazzilions and make them very, very famous.

give a dog a bad name

I don't want to detract from Mr McMuffin's rather eloquent account, but I just had to protest the semi-psychotic wife bit. It really goes to show that you can spend your whole life fairly sane and relatively calm, but become a bit bonkers for three months in early pregnancy and will anyone let it go? The short answer is, of course, no.

slinky the warrior

We just had a bit of excitement. We heard the most godawful noise outside. I went out to have a look and found Slinky battling with another cat through the nice little hole that I had cut in the fence for him. Who would have thought that he would end up using the hole as a defensive battlement. I have no doubt that if he had boiling oil to hand, he would have poured it. It has just occured to me that we are so lucky that it's not a cat's paw on the button that will signal the beginning of armageddon. Slinky would have pushed that button tonight. The noises were incredible. I had no idea that he could make those noises. The other cat seemed pretty quiet in comparison. I soon sorted it out by throwing a glass of water over the pair of them. I then shooed Slinky into the house, and he hissed at me! He looked magnificent, all puffed up like a little cat all puffed up. His tail must have grown to three times it's usual thickness (which was quite impressive in an entirely un-double-entendre kind of way). He is beginning to calm down, but Mrs McMuffin just called me in to the living room to witness Slinky tearing chunks out of a newspaper and scattering them about the room. Better out than in, as my mummy used to say.

jelly baby porn

I found this on a banner link to an adult interest site. It made me laugh. I'm not going to post the link, because this is not that kind of blog.

poor slinky

I went off to the Christmas karaoke (it's a very long story) with Mrs McMuffin leaving little Slinky to enjoy the evening in peace. I came home a couple of hours later, leaving Mrs McMuffin to sing her heart out, and I found Slinky in a Mexican stand-off with another cat in our hallway. God knows how long they had been stood there, but they could have been staring each other out for the last three hours for all I know, but neither are telling. When I walked in the front door, the other cat blinked and Slinky was on him in a flash, slashing and tearing. Fortunately, the other cat was able to make a break for it, back out through the cat flap. It was all very exciting. Slinky was so wound up by the experience that when I stroked him, he acted like his usual self, enjoying the fuss, but then, as if he couldn't quite control himself, he let out a little hiss. It wasn't really directed at me, more just into the air. Poor Slinky has not been able to settle since. After he had ripped some more paper, he has wandered the house wailing for the last couple of hours. He slid under the TV at one point and gave the wall a good spray. Fortunately, Mrs McMuffin cleaned it up. It was fun watching her trying to get under the TV to wipe the wall. I wish I'd had the camera handy. Slinky has even shit in the bathroom because he is too scared to go outside. I must admit his pooing in the bathroom is quite cute. He has a poo alongside the toilet. It's almost as if he knows what it is for. I just don't think I could bear a repeat of the terrible time we suffered a couple of years ago when Ra was trying to worm his way into our affections. By the way, this is a new cat. A big tabby tom cat that I haven't seen before. I just don't get how the cats round here behave. They just ignore all of each others signals and blithely go into each other's houses. I guess it must be a male thing.

apple are lovely

I have discovered something very interesting. Apparently Apple will replace faulty iPod headphones and some cables, which usually cost a small fortune, for free. I have just ordered myself a new set of headphones. Mine just weren't right. Just go through the form, and unless you ask for something huge, like a new iPod, you shouldn't be asked for your credit card details. This usually means they want you to return the faulty goods. Of course, it goes without saying that you need to actually own the iPod or else that would be like stealing.

my new ipod

I have completely forgotten to mention my lovely new iPod (the video one) that I got last month. It truly is a lovely machine. All that stuff you might have read about it is true. To hold one, is to want one. There is something very sensual about the smooth curves. The only problem is that it gets finger prints on it! I haven't really been willing to use it properly yet, because I don't want to scratch the screen. I am waiting for the huge range of cases that will be upon us like an avalanche shortly. The sound is fantastic, as expected, and, although Apple don't seem to be advertising this, the sound has more depth to my ears and it goes much louder than my older iPod. Perhaps Apple were able to sort things out with those nasty French people who insisted on hobbling the poor machine to protect the delicate ears of French children. As a video player, it is just what I was looking for. It goes without saying that I really wanted a machine that I could carry on my keyring, held 5000 full-length HD movies that I could project onto a wall, and cost 53p to buy. What I got instead was a 30Gb iPod. The video quality on the machine is surprisingly sharp and very easy to watch. The screen, which at first glance seems a bit small, is a comfortable size for watching the odd episode of Star Trek or a shortish movie. I'm not sure what it would be like to try and watch The Godfather part II on it. Having said that, the machine connects very simply to a full size TV, with the purchase of an optional AV cable, of course. This is the feature that most interested me. I wanted to be able to watch the odd movie when I go on holiday. The quality of the picture is pretty good. It's not HD, or even DVD for that matter. It is probably a bit like watching an ever so slightly degraded VHS tape, although I can hardly remember what that was like. The long and the short of it is that it's not great but it's okay, and will certainly do for when I have to watch a movie in an emergency.

My old iPod is now serving time as a back-up drive. I have loaded on a copy of OSX and the files I can't bear to lose, having lost them several times in the past. That is one difference between the older iPod and the new one. The older one is bootable, whereas the new one isn't. I don't imagine that will make that much difference to most people, but it was a little bit of extra functionality that I liked.

What can I say, I love my new iPod.

PS the baby iPod shirts arrived today. They are just so cute. I can't wait to dress him up and push his buttons (in a good way of course).

mr mcmuffin, the hero

Poor Slinky has taken to following Mr McMuffin around the house for protection and looking at him adoringly as if he is a mixture of the Dalai Lama and Rambo. It's just occurred to me for that for a few years, Mr McMuffin is going to be looked at by our son in a similar way and will represent his first model of masculinity. So my son will cook, clean, be technologically capable, forced to wear little iPod inspired clothes (what happened to the 'we're not being stupid and spending a fortune on cutesy little clothes for the baby, he'll wear the cheapest babygrows and love them'?) struggle to work up the enthusiasm to do anything outside the home except shop and listen to loud music and be a glass half empty kind of boy with a cruel and twisted sense of humour and a beard and glasses.

look what i got...

For some reason it hadn't even occured to me that we should get a video camera, what with the bairn arriving soon, an' all. Mrs McMuffin planted the seed yesterday, and I have been researching ever since. We can't really afford a sub £1000 jobby, so I have decided that we should go even cheaper, and opted for a Sanyo Xacti C5, which has had good-ish reviews everywhere, and the only problem that I can see with it is that it doesn't film very well in poor light. Anyway, we are watching War of The Worlds tonight, and I thought I would have a fag break. Before heading off to the back door, I thought I would have a quick look at how our bid for a super-duper pram is going on eBay. While I was there, I thought I would look at cameras. I found a fantastic offer of a brand new, as in not second-hand, Sanyo Xacti C5 with 2Gb memory and an extra battery, and a whole load of other stuff, for only £259. That was too good a bargain to pass up. Mrs McMuffin surprised me by immediately agreeing that it was a good deal, and that I should buy one. It is now done, and we will soon be the proud owners of a beautiful new camera. Ain't the internet wonderful?

*warning* do not read this post if you are of a nervous disposition, or feeling that life has been a bit of a disappointment recently

There was a little rock & pop trivia book given away with this month's Q magazine. I was drawn to the entry for the claim that Gloomy Sunday is reputed to be the world's most depressing song. After listening to this song, people kill themselves, apparently. Well, I've just listened to three different versions of it, and I don't feel in the least bit suicidal. Ha! I laugh in the face of danger. If there are any of you out there who want to join me in my reckless death defying acts of extreme music listening, then here are a couple of versions for you. The first is by Marianne Faithfull. The second version is by Billie Holiday, who apparently added a third verse to the song in the hope that it wouldn't be so damn depressing.

retrobug-a-loo

For some strange reason, for me, most of my very favourite, stand the test-of-time, music was made in the late 60s and early 70s. I didn't listen to any of this stuff growing up because the only music my parents listened to was country. You know, I've never been able to work out the relationship between the Scottish and country music. Of course, there's the obvious universal concerns about relationships, but the social and political context just seems so very different. Anyway, Scottish people love country music. I guess that's all there is to it. Now, back to what I was saying, I didn't start buying my own music until I started work when I was 16. I was never really into chart music as such, although I did listen religiously to the BBC charts on Sunday evening and watch Top of The Pops every week, of course, like everyone else. Recently, I have noticed that a lot of young whipper-snapper bands are producing music that harks back to my golden age of rock. I've been listening to a couple of new bands a lot and I thought I would share with you a couple of tracks. The first is a track called Set Us Free by the band called Black Mountain. Heavily influenced by Led Zeppellin, they make music that is an amalgamation of rock styles from over the last 30 or 40 years, and yet they do it with such verve and committment that it begins to sound fresh again. The other track is 1970 by Black Cab, a long meandering affair. The final track on the concept album, The Altamont Diary, which deals with the way in which the killing at the famous concert signalled the end of the summer of love. Great stuff!

While I'm here, I might as well mention Neil Diamond, who has a new Rick Rubin produced album out at the moment, called 12 Songs, although the version I have has 14 songs on it. Not sure what that's all about. Rubin, who did wonders for Johnny Cash, has done the same for Neil Diamond. The music is pared back to the basics of Diamond's always wonderful voice, and his guitar. Listening to this reminds me just how good Neil Diamond is once he is stripped of the bombast that has marred his music over the last 20 years or so. There really isn't a dud track on the album, but I thought you would like this one, Save Me A Saturday Night.

a hard morning spending...

I have finally discovered the joys of eBay and I've spent the morning spending money. I didn't do much bidding it has to be said because I have never had any luck with that. I have bought a new pram, a moses basket and a rocking stand, or should that be a stand that rocks, a fixed car seat with two bases, and a birthing pool. I have even ordered a TENS machine for Mrs McMuffin. A very productive day, so far. Although, I should admit that I had planned to do some work on my dissertation today! Ah well, tomorrow is another day.

good news

I just had some great news. Do you remember that I raved about Antony and The Johnson a few months ago? I was so disappointed that over the course of a couple of weeks he went from being unheard of to being the talk of the town, and a few weeks later he won the Mercury Music Prize. By the time I got round to trying to buy some tickets to see him, the world and their mother and little sister and second cousins had already bought them all. I had kind of given up on seeing him. However, Ms Single Cookie is going to see them tomorrow night, and she has a spare ticket! Guess who is going to see Antony and The Johnsons tomorrow night? That's right, ME! It was a close call though. Ms Single Cookie offered the ticket to Ms Gypsy Tart first, but fortunately for me, she remembered how much I liked them. They are lovely, lovely people.

night time has become a flexible concept

Thanks to heartburn (handy hint: crystallised ginger is more effective than Gaviscon or Rennies) and having to pee up to five times a night (handy hint: just go to the toilet). Oh well, back to bed to see if I can grab another hour without interruption.

me too...

I was fortunate to have been woken at 5.30am by Slinky jumping on my chest and screaming in my face. After he had picked himself off the floor, he went back downstairs. I could hear him screaming at Mrs McMuffin for her to go back to bed. Just as Mrs McMuffin was getting back into bed, I decided to get up. It's just as well I did because at about 6am I heard the catflap open, and who should be coming in for a light breakfast but the new evil cat in the neighbourhood. I chased him out of the house. Poor Slinky has been suffering over the last few days, and he just can't seem to settle. I now know why. His home is continually being invaded by this cat. He has even been a bit worried about going out the back door and has insisted that we let him out the front door at night, which I thought was a little bit odd. It all begins to make sense now. The poor animal has been under seige. I'm not exactly sure what to do about it, other than to sit up all night guarding the catflap.

The other good thing about being up so early is that I have had the opportunity to play with some new software. I have found this fantastic app called Stellarium which allows you to view the sky from your location. It is a wonderful, free, bit of software. I took this screenshot of the view from my door, or at least this is what I would see if it wasn't cloudy, and there was less chemical and light pollution. By the way, I found the app at Freemacware a fantastic new resource for Mac freeware.

oh dear...

I have been mindlessly listening to music this morning. I was just letting iTunes surprise me when suddenly this song started playing. I'd not heard it before, but it completely changed the way I listen to this song. Damn! Why did they do that?

they've thought of everything

The new camera arrived a little while ago, and I am waiting for the battery to charge up. I have no idea what the picture quality is going to be like, but I am really impressed with the package that arrived. Apart from the fact that I was charged £30.99 excise customs duty, which I had to pay to the UPS guy before he would let me have my camera. This makes it slightly less of a bargain, but I still feel quids in. The camera is lovely to look at, weighs virtually nothing, and has come with every single thing I could possible need. Between Sanyo and DigitalRev, the shop I bought it from, I am inundated with cables for connecting to every conceivable electronic device known to man, except, perhaps, for our toaster, but that is quite an old model, 2 batteries, a 2Gb SD card, docks, both for the camera and for charging the battery, screen protectors, cases, straps, lense covers, little baby remote control and instruction books and software. There is even a little mini dock connector and travel multi-plug thingies for taking abroad. Oh, and there's a cute little tripod too. This is a fantastic package, something you don't see very often these days. I don't think I need to buy anything else. I just hope that this isn't designed to act as some kind of compensation for the poor performance of the camera. I'll let you know as soon as the battery has charged. I am very excited.

i couldn't help myself, mrs mcmuffin

I have been fantasing about a new stereo for some time. I was browsing through eBay to see what was available, and I found the Sonic Impact T-Amp. Amazingly, it only costs £15.95, and that's for a brand new one. I did a little bit of investigating and it turns out that this little amp has turned the hi-fi world on it's head. Apparently, it produces a sound that is the equal of, and sometimes better than, amps that cost £1000s. It sounds too good to be true, but review after review convinced me to try one. I couldn't really follow all the audiotechnobabble, but it still sounds good. Of course, I'm getting the bog standard plastic version, but there are some beautiful mod jobs out there. Look at these.

mrs mcmuffin...spoilsport

I have been playing with the camera all afternoon instead of writing the report that I need to have in on Monday, but it's been worthwhile. It is a great little machine. The quality of the still photos are excellent, and the movies are good. I've had a few problems though. Trying to play MP4s (640x480@30FPS) has only highlighted the fact that I need a new computer. Playback is a little bit jerky. However, it plays fine at 320X240@15FPS, and I have experimented with transfering the full quality video to DVD. That seems to work well. By the way, I have discovered that most TV quality video is run at around 15FPS, or slightly higher, but rarely as high as 30FPS, so what is that all about. I wanted to post a video I'd made of our garden, but Mrs McMuffin vetoed it. I'll post something a little more anonymous over the weekend. Strangely, she has agreed that I can post the video I am going to make of her giving birth to our son next month...Not really!

christmas shopping

It has finally happened. I have become a middle class do-gooder. I have bought most of my presents from the World Vision alternative gifts catalogue this year. I have bought a herd of goats,a bog, some footballs etc. I think they are great presents for people who live in the lap of luxury, which is most of us, in a comparative sense. Now, why don't you stop buying all those expensive, but ultimately useless gifts, and get something useful for a change. Some little child in the world will love you for it. Go on, you know it makes sense.

(I suggested to Mr McMuffin that he may want his Christmas presents from the same place and he did not greet the idea with any enthusiasm at all. He may be all middle class now, but his altruism needs further work.)

monk-ey

I thought you might like to see a lovely photo of Mrs McMuffin in the full flush of pregnancy. She does actually walk like something out of Planet of the Apes now when the bairn is hanging low.

frenzy

We seem to have got caught up in an unprecedented level of spending on the Bairn and the various pieces of equipment we think we are going to need for him and for us, to keep us entertained during the hell that lies ahead. Today we found ourselves buying a sling for Mr McMuffin to carry the boy and he chose some clothes. He's done a good job, not a fluffy bunny or a vile teddy in sight and I have to confess that there is something very satisfying about imagining an actual baby rather than a wriggling bump filling the clothes out.

I have another week left at work and then the real decline begins, as I'll probably find that I've reclined on the sofa one too many times and am unable to return to a vertical position and will be stranded like a beetle on my back until relieved of the Bairn. Mr McMuffin still thinks it's amusing to throw things I want on the floor, but even he's not cruel enough to make me pick them up as I have completely lost any grace I once had and walk like a monkey, a monkey that topples over in the bathroom when trying to pick up something off the floor and that overbalances when putting socks on.

I am really frightened of stopping work as it means my world will narrow so much and then I'm going to have to go throught the process of opening it up again when I go back-how on earth am I going to take care of things at the office when we have a child to take care of too? I know other parents seem to manage (at considerable personal effort and sacrifice) but I don't really believe that I am I as able as them. I'm just so glad I don't have to do any of this on my own and I really hope that Mr McMuffin and I can fill in the gaps for each other and for the boy. I'm also quite scared that I'll become one of those people that regales the completely uninterested in tales of the child's first solid shit and can't bear to leave him for a single second, or else I'll be begging to go back to work in the third week and pretending that I have no child. I suppose we'll just have to see what I become.

last day...

...tomorrow. That's come round very quickly and I'm not sure I'm ready yet. Perhaps I could have another few months to really get myself prepared. Is that OK, Santa?

By the way, Santa, Mr McMuffin is not as good a boy as he thinks he is. He is quite good, but really doesn't deserve everything he is asking for (even if we were made of money). If he tries very hard and is very extra special good and kind to his lovely wife between now and Christmas Eve, he may find that one or two little things make their way under the tree. I heard him say that he was going to write you another letter, perhaps you could write back and work something in about changing the bedding and doing all the cleaning? Just a suggestion.

limbo

We seem to have lost two posts in the latest Typepad storm, including Mr McMuffin's letter to Santa. I hope Santa managed to read it before it disappeared, or we're going to have a disappointed man on Christmas Day.

I'm feeling a little bit in limbo myself. I woke this morning thinking about all the things I needed to get done over the weekend and then realised that the distinction wasn't going to be that important any more-yesterday was my last day at work for months. I think I'd been in denial about the whole stopping work thing, but the beautiful flowers I got from my new and old teams to celebrate getting rid of me were a bit of a reminder. I'm sure I'm no different from anyone else, feeling ambivalent about the changes ahead, but there's no ambivalence about how grateful I am to be even having these feelings.

epic

"I would give all my presents for you, but of course it would tear at my heart"

Sounds like something from a Jim Steinman/Meatloaf epic, but no, they were Mr McMuffin's exact words to Slinky less than five minutes ago. I tell you, that cat has too big a place in our lives.

right then...

...I'm done moaning, agonising and going on and on about things. From now on I have banned all baby related introspection. Not all baby related thoughts will disappear though, it may interest you to know that I still haven't decided whether Mr McMuffin or Gypsy Tart gets the choice task of scooping my poo from the birthing pool. My midwife says women don't actually poo that much, if they poo at all, but I rather like the idea of having one of them on alert. The pool is just part of the the natural approach I plan to take. I suspect this plan will only last until the first contraction hits, then I'll be shouting for a lift to the hospital and an epidural.

Mr McMuffin is trying to upgrade our stereo from his classic kit, to something a little smaller that actually works. He is in love with the £15 amp he bought and no doubt will write about it soon. I caught him trying to take it apart last night, but I warned him that the miniaturised monkeys that make it work would escape, so he's left it well alone now. I have to wonder if it's only got to be a priority as he couldn't cope with having poor quality sound at high volume to drown out my screams of agony. I have to say though, Back in Black has never sounded so good.

We're braving the crowds today and going christmas shopping. Mr McMuffin only has a couple of extra presents to get, whereas I've got to do the whole lot. I'm very tempted just to get another herd of goats, or maybe a nice lttle toilet block, but as I said before, he's not that middle class.

this is incredible...

I mentioned that I had got a Sonic Impact Class T-Amp a while ago. I have been playing with it over the last couple of days. What can I say, other than this is an absolutely amazing little machine. I have never been particularly interested in stereos. I just want them to go a bit loud and sound okay. I've managed the last 15 years with my Nad 3020i amp. This £15 amp is easily the equal of that one. I'm afraid I don't have the audiophiles obsession with describing the sound I hear, so all I can say is, even at this early stage before the amp has been properly broken in, the sound is wide and crystal clear, the bass is punchy (giving AC/DC's Back in Black a great crunch). Given the price, it's hard to find anything to criticise, although I will try. It will hardly come as any surprise to you if I tell you that it is a horrible plasticky thing with really cheap fixtures, so you might be tempted like me to try and fit it into a better looking box. How hard can that be? The good news, and there is more good news, is that it is tiny and you can hide it very easily. Here is a picture of it next to my 30Gb iPod.

a rude awakening...

*Warning* This post contains scenes of urinating cats, mild peril and fantasy violence.

I might as well get straight to the point. Slinky woke me up this morning by spraying in my face. For a second or two it felt nice and warm and the thought crossed my mind that he was being unbearably cute again, and was licking my face. But no, he was peeing on me. There had been no big build up. Usually when he sprays in front of us, or on us, as he has done to me a couple of times now, we, or that should probably be me, have been ignoring his cries for attention. This morning he just jumped up on the bed stood on my chest and let rip. It worked, because I got up pretty quickly. The darling cat was waiting on the landing and danced ahead of me as I trudged downstairs. He had a few mouthfuls of food, went outside for a pee, then dashed back upstairs to sleep with Mrs McMuffin in our pee soaked bed. He didn't seem in the least bit distressed and he already had some food, I think Mrs McMuffin had got up in the night to feed him.

I have absolutely no idea why he did it, or what he wanted. The unconscious is an amazing thing, even little catty ones. I imagine he is very worried about what will happen to him once the baby is born. Will he still have a place in our hearts? The only problem is, of course, is that his behaviour forces us to exclude him from our lives, making his worst fears come true. It's like he is trying to force us to choose between him or the new baby. I must admit, until he peed on my face, I wasn't sure which way I was going to go.

Mrs McMuffin here to correct the impression that Mr McMuffin gave of me lying in a cat pee soaked bed this morning. Au contraire, the bed was stripped immediately and everything has been washed. I think it's important for the world to know my standards haven't dropped!

i just knew it...

It official (at least as far as I am concerned) chocolate really is good for you. They've done research and everything.

thankfully

These children lived. However, despite Social Services never having been told about these children, I bet they still get blamed in the public imagination and no Health or Education workers get disciplined. I suppose we'll just have to see.

civil partnerships

I think these are the beginning of a good thing, but I still don't understand why a whole new class of legal relationship had to be created, for the sake of simplicity and equality why not just extend civil marriage? Anyway, congratulations to everyone who entered into a civil partnership today, may your partnerships be happy and enduring.

king kong

We went to see King Kong on Thursday morning. Believe the hype, it is a three hour plus bum numbing thirst making fag dying extravaganza. It looks fantastic and while some of the CGI seems to go for blurry speed rather than detail, you can believe in Kong because he has soulful eyes. For me the big let down with CGI has always been around the eyes. Who would care if the creature had the most realistic hair in the world if his eyes were flat and lifeless. The big surprise for me though was Naomi Watts. Quite apart from the fact that she is much more beautiful than I remembered, she creates a emotional resonance for Ann Darrow that stays with you after the film has ended.

I won't give away the end of the film, but it is probably enough to say that it doesn't end well. Both Mrs McMuffin and I had to dry our damp eyes before heading off into the thronging crowds of Bluewater to complete our Christmas shopping.

This is a great entertainment and well worth the investment of a sizeable chunk of your life. Go and see it now.

I would give this film 4/5.

nadolig llawen

For everybody celebrating Christmas this year, we McMuffins wish you a lovely time. If you're not celebrating Christmas, then too bad, you won't be getting any lovely presents. I'm sorry if you haven't got a card from us, we had hoped to send people e-cards of Mr McMuffin as Joseph and me as Mary (I never got to be Mary in school nativity plays and this year I kept hinting to the Head of the Infant's school in which my team was based that I was available, but she rejected my offer for a far less authentic child of approximately three foot in height, a veritable dwarf!) but we never got round to that either.

Anyway, we're at Gypsy Tart and Rock Cake's tomorrow for Christmas, then on Boxing Day we're off to see Mr McMuffin Jnr and the Beau and have another Christmas dinner. Then we're back home and I'm not moving too far away from it, just in case.

seasons greetings

A little Christmas card from the McMuffins. It's bloody typical though, we ask Gypsy Tart to take our photo and she still manages to get the palm tree to grow out of our heads.