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it had to happen one day...or I was asking for it...
Well, I got my reference. It is probably the very worse reference that anyone (who is not stark raving mad) has ever written for anyone ever. I really do mean ever. For some reason my referee has decided that I should never work again. I don't imagine that it will come as much of a surprise to hear that my prospective employers are now having second thoughts. For most of today the serpent of anxiety has been flexing it's coils in my stomach, and I've felt a bit sick all afternoon. That's not a very nice feeling. Fortunately, Mrs McMuffin and my friends, of course I have told practically everyone about it, have been very supportive. They say, "oh, but that's not you." The only problem I have with it all is that the reference does contain a germ of truth. I can see myself in all that has been said about me. It's just a little bit skewed, that's all. The truth is a funny thing.
I have made a formal complaint, and it was good to hear that HR didn't know anything about the reference. I had to send them a copy. The other good thing is that the reference is almost cartoon bad. It's almost too bad to believe.
I did do a bad thing though. I was so angry that I sent a copy to everyone in my old team. I didn't say it, but I guess I wanted them to know that this could happen to them. Oh, no that's not true. I just wanted to cause some trouble. I wonder if it did? I hope so. Does that make me bad?
mr mcmuffin on 19 May 2005 @ 11:14 PM ✲ Permalink
Comments
I hope it all gets sorted out soon in your favour.
Posted by: David (TEFL Smiler) | 20 May 2005 00:18:10
Can't you change names to protect the innocent so we can read the worst reference letter ever? Paleeze?
Posted by: karan | 20 May 2005 07:36:58
After what you were experiencing, it sounds par for the course that they should give you a jolly good slagging off, it's the sort of thing a petty little pen pushing squirt of a manager would do, when you've actually gone. If they did this when you were still in the post, they might have risked a good thumping or at least your pissing in their latte.
Possibly a bad move circulating it to your colleagues before you have properly aired your complaint.
My chavvish curiosity also dictates that I too would love to see some or all of this reference they gave you. What have you got to lose ? KP
Posted by: Keith | 20 May 2005 08:08:33
A bit more discretion is sometime advisable but how does this reference compare to other ones you have? If it is so different from all the others the message it will carry is the vindictiveness of its author. This all makes you sound like the John Rebus of social work.
Posted by: David.2 | 20 May 2005 11:16:43
That's a good point, David, (look I'm so indignant I'm answering Mr McMuffin's questions) his other references are glowing and completely contradict this one. This kind of reference is NEVER seen in social work, we seem to work on the 'if you can't say anything nice...' principle. I suppose it gives him a certain distinction!
Posted by: mrs mcmuffin | 20 May 2005 14:02:34
Not bad, but cautious. I once got a bad reference from a referee who hated my guts ( from four that I worked with, she was the only one I didn't get on with), so I went to see the others and got three really good references. If you are unionised you may have some recourse if it effects your employment prospects.
Posted by: Alistair | 20 May 2005 16:24:15
To quote Betty Davis: What a bitch. This is the very reason why our company will not give any employee a reference. They will only confirm that we worked there and the dates. Educated people will see through the vindictiveness of the referee and wisely toss it into the circular file.
Posted by: Loretta | 20 May 2005 17:38:12
I know the feeling. And I have seen others go through this. Perhaps the referee is feeling threatened or jealous? She sure took a lot of time and energy to aim her poison darts. She did not realize it would be her that looks pretty darn mean, bitchy and spiteful.
Posted by: aithne | 22 May 2005 23:51:09
