personal review of 2004

In no particular order:

Didn't write my dissertation. Acquired 74 albums released in 2004. Went to Rome and threw a coin in the Trevi Fountain. Put on 14lbs in weight. Lost my job. Sold a hair from my chinny chin chin on eBay. Went to my brother's wedding in July. Haven't spoken to my brother since July. Found a new job. Went to Madeira for the fourth time. Met David TEFLSmiler. Met Kirsty Boblog. Met Iowahawk. Finally learned how to spell Iowa. Lost 7lbs in weight. Disenfranchised Wyoming. Finally worked out how to fully customise TypePad HTML. No further forward with my plans for world domination. Transformed the room of shame into the white room Drank approximately 250 bottles of red wine, 20 bottles of white wine, 10 bottles of pudding wine, 2 bottles of Amereto (and another couple of bottles of various liqueurs and spirits) 8 pints of bitter, 45 gallons of tea (milk but no sugar), 145 gallons of coffee (black, instant, expresso and cafetiere)... Ate 68 lbs of chocolate. Smoked 10950 cigarettes. Put on 7lbs in weight. Listened to music on my iPod every single day. Became very depressed. Had 80 hours of psychotherapy. Have come out of depression. Got very drunk on a least two occasions (I thought I was past that). Saw around 900 films, both new and old. Read 9 novels, mostly SF (hardly read any novels since I started my psychotherapy training). Read 45 Mac magazines from cover to cover, adverts and all, twice. Spent about 1500 hours playing on the computer. Ate out 3 times, apart from holidays (why eat out when I cook so much better than they do). Filled the dishwasher at least 300 times. Became a statswhore. Emptied the dishwasher at least 120 times. Rewashed dishes in the dishwasher at least 50 times. Changed bedding at least twice. Wiped up Slinky's poo 6 times. Had my third ariel stolen from car. Slept around 2190 hours. Didn't become independently wealthy. Reestablished diplomatic relations with Wyoming. Still loving Mrs McMuffin. Had around 420 baths or showers. Washed my hair 380 times. Had my hair cut 5 times. Lost 4lbs in weight. Lost my job.