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do you feel like this little girl who has been left to hold up the wall while her parents nip down the pub for a quick pint?
I have been in discussions with Retrogirl about the possibilty of writing something for her new internet magazine. I have told her that I have always wanted to be an agony aunt. So, this is like a trial. We will be available for the entire weekend to answer any problem you might have. No problem is too big, or too small. How can we help you? Please note that if possible anything you say to us will be shameless exploited for monetary gain.
mr mcmuffin on 21 Jan 2005 @ 09:29 PM ✲ Permalink
Comments
Dear Mr&MrsMc
I am in emotional turmoil. I seem to have fallen in love with the cat. I speak to it now in the way I used to speak to the wife many years ago, and hardly speak to the wife at all. And lately I find any old excuse to go and sleep in the spare room, and take the cat with me. I'm not sure how the law stands these days, but can I possibly divorce the wife and marry the cat?
Yours hopefully
Confused
Posted by: Confused | 22 Jan 2005 11:00:13
Dear Auntie and Uncle McMuffin
I am hoping that you can give me some advice on my sideboards. I like having them and I feel naked and wide-faced without them.
The problem is, however, that I've never been able to get my sideboards even. This is because my face is not perfectly symmetrical, and I'm sure my ears must be different sizes. They're probably also positioned differently.
The result is that I can get my sideboards to look even from the front, with each reaching down to the same part of the ear. However, this results in one sideboard being much longer than the other.
Alternatively, I can trim each sideboard to the same length, but then they look wrong from the front, as one of them will always finish higher on my face than the other.
Please help me, as I'm at a loss at what to do. Not having sideboards does not seem like an option, as it would remind me too much of those 1980s mullet or helmet days, and the thought of a return to that nightmare is too much for me to take.
Yours lop-sidedly
Sideboard Man
Posted by: Sideboard Man | 22 Jan 2005 15:56:44
Surely they're sideBURNS David! Sideboards are something to keep glassware and crockery in? Or is that indeed what you're growing on your face...?
Posted by: Steve | 22 Jan 2005 23:49:25
Dear Sideboardman
Have you considered lowering your ears?
Posted by: Helpful | 23 Jan 2005 00:07:51
Steve: Not for me! - I see sideBURNS as some Dickensian monstrosity, most recently seen on John McC on CBB.
Sounds pricey and painful, Helpful!
Posted by: Sideboard Man | 23 Jan 2005 15:16:10
yes yes yes its BURNS. Where did all this boards business come from....????
Posted by: single cookie | 24 Jan 2005 17:18:09
Mm, just looked at the picture again... do you think she's got her finger in a dyke...??
(That should get your stats up if nothing else does.)
Posted by: single cookie | 24 Jan 2005 17:19:33
